Funny Quotes

My parents are very funny when they have to deal with anything racy or off-color. They usually pretend they don't speak English.

The pressure to being a comedian is being funny, but I've given that up, so there is no pressure whatsoever.

Nothing's funny about someone who's successful.

And there's a visceral fun in watching Team America and making it, like taking a puppet and throwing it against the wall. Because it's not CG, there's something funny about it.

My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.

Don't get me wrong, there are sometimes if I go and see a really funny comedy, that I wished I had smoked a joint. I'll be honest with you. That's the truth.

Books are funny little portable pieces of thought.

This is the great thing about Northern Ireland. I walk down the street and people stop me and say things like, 'I know you. You're that wee golfer, aren't you?' I say, 'Yeah, that's me.' They say, 'Keep it up, wee man.' It's very funny and that's why I want to stay here as long as possible.

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.

I guess when I think about it, one of the things I like to dramatise, and what is sometimes funny, is someone coming unglued. I don't consider myself someone who is making the argument that I support these choices. I just think it can be funny.

I have a very low level of recognition, which is fine by me.

There's been a lot of coming home in the early mornings after funny nights out, having bizarre sandwiches in bed.

Kids cannot follow stories. They don't know what the hell is going on in a cartoon. They like to see funny visual things happening.

I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there.

Well, I did Marlene 15 years ago and that's in the style. It's somehow similar and not similar because Marlene was much more aggressive, funny and sad.

It's a real primal thing, watching someone get hurt. It's funny and accessible.

I have a new philosophy. I'm only going to dread one day at a time.

It's to paint directly on the canvas without any funny business, as it were, and I use almost pure turpentine to start with, adding oil as I go along until the medium becomes pure oil. I use as little oil as I can possibly help, and that's my method.

If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets.

My family's always been really funny. I feel like comedy's hard. I feel like it's so important.

The funny thing is I'm not bothered or sad about being on my own - after all I've never had a husband.

If you look at the game and everything, it's not quite like looking at an animated film, because that's total character. This, this is really movement, but it's got funny little things if you look for the humor. They're actually getting to the character.

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.

I was going through a little bit of turbulence in my career. And so, it's funny how turbulence itself will make you hold onto something for security. And so the only thing I knew is trust in the Lord and lean not unto your own heart, in all thy ways acknowledge him and he shall direct thy path.

It's funny how social activists usually protest against the only things that have a credible chance of achieving the activists' goals.

What has been happening more lately - of course, I also put in my bio, I say I do the voice of Goliath, but some people go - you know, I say something, and it's a funny thing when you work in this business, people will talk out loud in front of you like you're not there.

I'm one of those hovering mothers and I know it's really important to have an independent child, so I'm trying to back off, but it's hard. I love him so much, and he's so funny and cute to me.

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.

At boarding school you had to wear your name across your chest and your back, and obviously I had a pretty funny name. It wasn't Brown or Smith or Hughes.

Forgiveness is a funny thing. It warms the heart and cools the sting.