Quotes By Scott Adams

I love magazines. It's such McNugget kind of information.

Be careful that what you write does not offend anybody or cause problems within the company. The safest approach is to remove all useful information.

There's nothing more dangerous than a resourceful idiot.

For most of my career I did one comic a day, every day, including weekends and holidays.

You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.

Most success springs from an obstacle or failure. I became a cartoonist largely because I failed in my goal of becoming a successful executive.

Obviously there's not much options when you're a cartoonist - you pretty much either work at home or rent an office I guess, and working at home just seems easier.

Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.

'Dilbert' became popular during the downsizing of the '90s, and job security was a major theme of the strip.

The only risk of failure is promotion.

I think 'Dilbert' will remain popular as long as employees are frustrated and they fear the consequences of complaining too loudly. 'Dilbert' is the designated voice of discontent for the workplace. I never planned it that way. It just happened.

We must develop knowledge optimization initiatives to leverage our key learnings.

In fact, most people are being squeezed in their little cubicle, and their creativity is forced out elsewhere, because the company can't use it. The company is organized to get rid of variants.

Women are treated differently by society for exactly the same reason that children and the mentally handicapped are treated differently.

There's kind of a toll you have to pay with a cat; if you don't pet her for 10 minutes she'll bother you for six hours.

I've always defined myself not as a cartoonist , but as an entrepreneur. That was true before I tried cartooning. I always imagined cartooning would be how I got my seed capital. I always thought my other businesses would be the less dominant part of my life.

I'm predicting that we'll finally have a computer will search my e-mail automatically and delete every message that begins with 'thought you'd be interested,' and then give an electrical shock to the sender to remind him or her to stop send that kind of message.

Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.

Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.

I burned out my drawing hand by using it too much. The common word for it is writer's cramp. The fancy words for it are focal dystonia. The symptom in my case was a pinky finger that went spastic when I tried to draw.

I respectfully decline the invitation to join your hallucination.

One of the reasons why you like to do your own drawings is, your style changes over time. And there's something about that that keeps it fresh to the viewer.

My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right.

Technology will definitely solve all our problems, but in the process it will create brand new ones. But that's O.K. because the most you can expect from life is to get to solve better and better problems.

Home is pretty utopian.

The best plan now is to have as many bosses as possible. I call it boss diversity. If you work for a company and you have one boss and that boss doesn't like you or wants to get rid of you, you're in trouble. But if you work for yourself, you have lots of bosses, who are your customers, and if a few of them decide they don't like you, that's okay.

I get mail; therefore I am.

I hated my work. It never seemed to me to be what I should be doing.

The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers.

Some of my best friends are Venture Capitalists, but let's face it, a hamster with Alzheimer's could make those kind of numbers. It's great work if you can get it.