Quotes By Paul Lynde

My kitchen is not a place to live in. I made it white so I can tell instantly if it's not clean-and I like it clean enough to be able to eat off the floors-or the tables, for that matter.

Learning lines is on my mind until I do know them. I'll read the paper or paint the house to keep from starting to memorize. I've never found an easy way.

A room is like a stage. If you see it without lighting, it can be the coldest place in the world.

My dad was a ham, too. He could sell those women anything. Of all his sons, I was the only one he could trust to sell as well as he could. I was proud of that.

If I ever completely lost my nervousness I would be frightened half to death.

A closet full of wire hangers can be the most dangerous place in the world.

Comedy is exaggerated realism. It can be stretched to the almost ludicrous, but it must always be believable.

I was obsessed with being rich and famous.

I sang in the choir for years, even though my family belonged to another church.

My table seats eight, so that's my maximum. Having a small number of guests is the only way to generate good conversation. Besides, your whole house doesn't get wrecked that way.

The whole romantic part of my life was a wipeout. I didn't even own a belt.

When I said I didn't have a cent, I didn't. I used to get annoyed with people who said they were broke when they had five dollars.

I may find something that looks interesting and then go on to alter the recipe by adding spices, things of my own. I also look for time-saving recipes, dishes that can be prepared ahead and stored.

I'm Liberace without a piano.

Food was a constant topic of conversation in our household.

If I'm not working, I don't know what to do.

I don't always prepare such rich meals. Sometimes I'll just serve a simple quiche, salad and dessert for dinner. During the week I try to eat lightly.

The doctor's name was Sylvia. I told her she'd have a problem with me because Sylvia was my mother's name.

I think basically an actor is a salesman.

I wish I had the nerve not to tip.

My sisters said, Why do you make those faces? You make yourself so ugly.

I don't understand why people don't remember my name.

I feel now it's useless to keep hoping. The way things are today, we live in a world that needs laughter, and I've decided if I can make people laugh, I'm making a more important contribution.

I laughed all the way through Love Story.

If I hadn't become a celebrity, I'd probably be an alcoholic.

Sandwiches are wonderful. You don't need a spoon or a plate!

It was the worst moment of my life. The producer came up and talked me back into going on stage.

I can't even get three weeks off to have cosmetic surgery.

An actor shouldn't undergo psychoanalysis, because there are a lot of things you're better off not knowing.

Someday I'm going to go onstage in a dress if I want to.