Quotes By Ogden Nash

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so many of the wrong persons.

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all.

Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying then without money?

People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.

The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.

Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.

Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.

Commitments the voters don't know about can't hurt you.