Quotes By Louis C. K.

Every day starts, my eyes open and I reload the program of misery. I open my eyes, remember who I am, what I'm like, and I just go, 'Ugh'.

When I take my kids out for dinner or lunch, people smile at us.

I know what it's like to have a bunch of material that's working that you don't care about. You want to die.

I don't think women are better than men, I think men are a lot worse than women.

I'm not sure why I'm so often disgusting on stage. I don't always know where it comes from.

I never viewed money as being 'my money' I always saw it as 'the money.' It's a resource. If it pools up around me then it needs to be flushed back out into the system.

The problem is, the more famous you get, the more people see you who didn't choose to.

I'm not motivated to entertain people through Twitter, so just by having Twitter and not saying anything, I make people mad.

It's more fun to experience things when you don't know what's going to happen.

I like all ladies of all different ages.

You can't cancel my stand-up tours. It's impossible. There's too many separate bosses. There is no 'bosses.'

I think one reason TV has always done well is because there is something comforting where you kind of know what you're going to be taken through.

The only pitch I have to movie people is the same as this one: Just give me $8 million. I'm not telling you what it's about and I'm not telling you who's in it.

Comedy isn't polite and it isn't correct and it isn't accurate, even. It's just a mess. So that's the way that I approach it.

I've tried to do away with lying in my life in the last few years, but it's hard.