Quotes By Kin Hubbard

Bargain... anything a customer thinks a store is losing money on.

Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best.

It ain't a bad plan to keep still occasionally even when you know what you're talking about.

The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin you.

The worst feature of a new baby is its mother's singing.

Getting talked about is one of the penalties for being pretty, while being above suspicion is about the only compensation for being homely.

A loafer always has the correct time.

Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny.

Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune.

The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.

A good listener is usually thinking about something else.

If capital and labor ever do get together it's good night for the rest of us.

Men are not punished for their sins, but by them.

It's pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.

Some fellows get credit for being conservative when they are only stupid.

Lack of pep is often mistaken for patience.

No woman can be handsome by the force of features alone, any more that she can be witty by only the help of speech.

Where ignorance is bliss it's foolish to borrow your neighbor's newspaper.

We would all like to vote for the best man but he is never a candidate.

Nobody works as hard for his money as the man who marries it.

The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store.

Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature.

A bee is never as busy as it seems; it's just that it can't buzz any slower.

There is nothing so aggravating as a fresh boy who is too old to ignore and too young to kick.

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest.

Peace has its victories no less than war, but it doesn't have as many monuments to unveil.

Nobody kicks on being interrupted if it's by applause.

Live so that you can at least get the benefit of the doubt.

If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on a vacation.

Don't knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while.