Quotes By Hal Sparks

Jerry Springer' is just kind of the chubby, redneck version of throwing Christians to the lions.

All musicians need a day job in the beginning. Unless they still live with their parents, I guess. I'm just lucky that my day job is simply another form of art.

I'm as heterosexual as any person need be. I'm open about my relationships - or lack thereof - in my own life, because I want to make the case that gay isn't contagious. It's not something that you can catch or learn or choose.

Truth be told, ginormous portions have become a pet peeve of mine.

There is never hesitation about doing stand-up. It's just me doing my thing.

If you take anything I say with any seriousness whatsoever, go study Yang style tai chi. It will make you live longer.

If 'Airplane!' comes on, it's like a comfort film. You can always guarantee a laugh watching that movie.

I noticed a lot of guitar players neglected the rhythm part of rhythm guitar and decided I would try to focus in that. As my skill and knowledge of the instrument grew, I found lead started to come naturally. Sometimes I play guitar like a frustrated drummer. Ha ha!

Political and social change is always a stagger-step process.

Anyone who still supports George Bush would still let Michael Jackson babysit their kids.

I've always said that I benefit, as an actor, from not having the illusion of security.

Tori Amos had a major influence on how I craft words in a song.

You would not believe how much time people waste in a day. And how little time they put into things they genuinely love.

There is never hesitation about doing stand-up. It's just me doing my thing. Unlike being in a band or a play or something, I don't have to rely on anyone else but me.