Quotes By Chris Rock

I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.

A man is only as faithful as his options.

Comedians tend to find a comfort zone and stay there and do lamer versions of themselves for the rest of their career.

America is the greatest country in the whole world.

Comedy is a group activity, a verbal orgy.

When I hear people talk about juggling, or the sacrifices they make for their children, I look at them like they're crazy, because 'sacrifice' infers that there was something better to do than being with your children.

When I do stand-up, I'm basically doing a one-man show.

My movies are okay, but they're not my specials.

Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.

Funny is only something that others know about you - you can't be funny by yourself.

A comedy club is a place where you work out material, you're trying material.

I'm an independent, but I got to admit I lean Democratic.

Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know?

A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House.

No film critic's going to say it, but 'Madagascar 3' is better than 'The Artist.'

The key to staying together is making sure you guys like each other and need each other.

I've seen women who don't have great relationships with their dads, and it all comes down to this: You have to tell girls you love them every day.

Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep.

A sense of humor is great - it goes a long, long way in a marriage.

Here's what I knew about doing a play: I knew it would make me a better actor.

I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.

Now that I have children, I realize taking care of my children is more fun than anything in the whole world.

Bill Cosby was the first comedian I was exposed to, because he doesn't curse.

Welcome to the 77th and last Oscars.

You don't need a critic to tell you people aren't laughing.

Anything you can suck at should make you nervous.

Movies have takes. But plays are like life - you don't really get takes.

I'm severely overrated. I'm just above a hack.

You don't pay taxes - they take taxes.

You can write a great country record and still be angry. Who's angrier than Toby Keith? He's angrier than the average 10 rappers.