Quotes By Bill Cosby

I don't have a problem believing in God and Jesus. But in Genesis one has to wonder about these sentences that just go on and end without finishing. The thought is unfinished. Where did Adam go? What is he doing? Hello? There has to be some pages missing.

Every success story has a parent who says, 'over my dead body.' Every success story has an old person who walks up to you and says, when you're acting the fool, 'you know I worry about you sometimes.'

Immortality is a long shot, I admit. But somebody has to be first.

The past is a ghost, the future a dream, and all we ever have is now.

When I say, I don't care what white people think, I mean that.

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.

The truth is that parents are not really interested in justice. They just want quiet.

Did you ever see the customers in health - food stores? They are pale, skinny people who look half - dead. In a steak house, you see robust, ruddy people. They're dying, of course, but they look terrific.

There are some people who have trouble recognizing a mess.

Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.

Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.

Nothing separates the generations more than music. By the time a child is eight or nine, he has developed a passion for his own music that is even stronger than his passions for procrastination and weird clothes.

My childhood should have taught me lessons for my own fatherhood, but it didn't because parenting can only be learned by people who have no children.

Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing.

You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.

I wasn't always black... there was this freckle, and it got bigger and bigger.

If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.

There is no job a man can do that is undignified - if he does it well.

People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what's bitter and move on.

I have to follow my thoughts and mine for the gold. I have to dig it out.

Poets have said that the reason to have children is to give yourself immortality. Immortality? Now that I have five children, my only hope is that they are all out of the house before I die.

Women don't want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think - in a deeper voice.

I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.

I want all this loud profanity in the street stopped. I want people to think about choices.

The main goal of the future is to stop violence. The world is addicted to it.

I was put in remedial everything.

Kids need to remember that when you put something on Twitter, it's not like whispering to your friend, you've put it on a billboard that the whole world, including your own kids someday, can see.

Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.

We've got to get the gun out of the hands of people who are supposed to be on neighborhood watch.

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.